Monday, April 30, 2012

Been a bit slack...

So I should have had this post up months ago...but now seemed like the right time..sorry followers..Bad blogger, bad ! A bit of a sad post, but we are sure there is a light at the end (hopefully not too distant) of the tunnel..

“Hello readers of our blog Well it is with some sadness that I add this update on our surrogacy journey. Late in January, we received news from our clinic that our tummy mummy had some complications that would later lend themselves to a great loss. Her waters had broken very early. Much too early. On the 22nd of January, very early in the morning our time. A half asleep call to our doctors and we had the news that our baby was not able to be saved at 20 weeks and 5 days. Thankfully though our surrogate was not negatively affected by the unfolding dramas, you just would not want any health risks happening to someone that was helping us create our dream of becoming a family.
Within a few days we were notified that our baby, a baby girl in fact, had been lost. Funnily enough we had all along been referring to the addition to our family as a girl. ‘The baby didn’t seem like enough of a reference for us. The one3 thing that we took some solace in, was that our baby girl was being loved and looked after in heaven by her nanny, another loss that we have suffered over the last few months. Enough we were thinking. No more for our family, we’ve had enough sadness and simply needed some wonderful news, some uplifting news.
But this is the dice you roll when you are in the game of baby making. And not just in the surrogacy game. Any family must traverse these risks. And many parents have had these terrible moments. Many parents, all over the world, at any given moment. We take stock of the love of each other, and those around us that have, and continue to support us in this journey.
We dust ourselves off. Give ourselves a moment to grieve and to mourn, to get angry, to cry. Telling people has become a little draining. It got to the point where just a look would be enough They would ask “How’s the baby going?”.”What’s news with your baby?” ..  Do we not tell people next time. And there will be a next time, there has to be. To give up now just doesn’t seem like an option. Not yet. One more red hot crack as some would say). And besides, there are those out there that have started knitting booties, and we can’t let them down (you know who you are J). “ ...
So there it is. The story up-to-date, and I promise to keep the news flowing in a more timely fashion !

Monday, November 14, 2011

Its been too long between posts !!

Hello blog world, I haven't left :)
Its been a busy few months. Some lows and then a very big high..So where to start ?
Well we have had a couple transfers without success, but that is the way with these procedures that we have become a part of. But lets go back a little further....

We were successful in effecting eight fertilised eggs. The first two transfers only gained us a betaHcg test result of 2 (both times only a 2).  Our first surrogate was allowed to rest again before her next transfer and during this time we had the opportunity to work with another wonderful lady who would act as a second surrogate during this resting period. After these two negative tests I was starting to feel a little (well maybe a lot) disheartened. I just pictured this happening in a fluid motion. Eggs, fertilised, transferred, 9 super-quick months, then a baby !

We had decided under the expert guidance of the SI doctors to try for blastocysts for the third transfer. Two fertilised eggs were allowed to develop in culture for a few extra days, while one fertilised egg was transferred to our original surrogate. After a couple days of waiting for news on our blasto's we received the unfortunate news that the fertilised eggs didn't develop to blastocyst stage. So, with only one egg transferred we decided that we needed to wait for another unsuccessful betaHcg test result then prepare for our last opportunity to do a transfer.

Then came the unbelievable high we had been waiting for.
On the 24th of September, while I was on my train home, an email came through. I tucked myself away in the corner of a seat and read, then re-read. Called Cam and got him to check and re-check. I have to admit, that train driver went slower than any before him, it wasn't me I am sure :)
We were pregnant. One transferred egg and we were pregnant. My boss even said to me 'One will be the magical number maybe' and she was right.
The test results came in thick and fast then..787 became 2395. Then that became 5877.

We were on our way to becoming a family. Dads, daddies, pop, poppy Mark ? Time to price nappies and formula. Organise cribs and the spare room. Not wanting to get ahead of our journey, but, here we go.

Monday, July 11, 2011


So after a weekend off, some retail therapy and getting out and about, we start the next stage and head over to Bandra Reclamation and to Lilavati Hospital.
Second floor, doors on the left. Second floor, doors on the left. It feels a little cloak and dagger at first. Head down..second floor, doors on the left. Just keep saying it. Didn't want to go right, or mess up !!
And after all that, it was an easy find.. right next to the cafeteria. As soon as we entered the room, it was obvious that we were in the right spot.
I am not sure what we were expecting, well what I was expecting, but Lilavati Hospital seemed very modern. As you would expect a hospital to be. It even smelt like a hospital would smell. Great facilities. And even though we weren't there for long enough to use the cafeteria, from my quick glance, I could and would highly recommend it for a bite to eat.

Thanks to Jaya and SI we were ushered into the process extremely quickly. It was a bit of a blur really, but welcomed. No sooner had we sat down, then it seemed we were ready to head back to the hotel. Back out into the heat of Mumbai, although I felt like I was getting used to it and back to the hotel. We spent the afternoon back at Holiday Inn.  Emails, calls back home and the like seemed to take up the rest of the afternoon.
Another tick in the list of things to be done. Everything seemed to be happening pretty smoothly to date. Fingers crossed !

Just a little side note, the best piece of advice I could give anyone is to have ALL the paperwork with you and double check before you go that everything is in order. It just makes things flow smoothly. Have copies of things. Have passport numbers, dates and all the little things on hand, it will make the process so much easier.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

The beat of a different drum...

So we have some days off before our next round of visits to hospitals and clinics and we decide to make our way to South Mumbai and the Gateway of India. Maybe some usual tourist spots but with such a short visit this time, it seems to be the best place to go. Some shopping, and be prepared to bargain. Everyone we met told us this. And it seems to ring true. 'Set price'.. just doesn't ring true. It takes a little getting used to, but soon you find your rhythm. Just must remember not to try it when I get home.

Lunch at Leopold’s (which I can highly recommend). Indian fare, Butter chicken and Chicken Tika with naan it’s all here for the taking, and I have discovered the refreshing qualities of Kingfisher beer.

There are the usual hawkers, ‘Come to our boat to Elephant Island’, ‘This is best pashmina you will find,Sir’ could all get a little overwhelming, until you realise that it is merely the chorus of the soundtrack that is India.
There are such a number of vendors, all clamouring fort the almighty rupee. It is the same the world round, just ten, no twenty fold in this overcrowded yet well visited destination.
There is a real heartbeat to this city. It takes  little while to hear it, but it is there.  A sometimes, in your face, thumping of a heartbeat, but none-the-less a life blood and rhythm that keeps things rolling along.

The noise of car horns suddenly becomes almost poetic.And it would almost be wrong not to have, what we would consider unnecessary honking, car horns bleating. Cars that seem to be following each other in such a random way... then suddenly, veering off into a side street that almost seems to have appeared from nowhere.  It all seems to work. The squeezing of cars. There seems to be spaces that open up where there wasn't a space before.

Righto, two days off, now bring on the next stage !